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Talk to them...

• Try to get more information about the nature of the behavior. Is the youth at risk of sexually hurting someone else? Vulnerable to being sexually taken advantage of? Making sexual comments or gestures that seem inappropriate?

• Ask about or try to find out what they are getting out of it and what need they are trying to fill. Find out how you can support them.

• Ask whether something happened that may be influencing their behavior.

• Teach them about safe sexuality and safe/unsafe touch, with other youth and with adults.

• Set clear limits about appropriate and inappropriate sexual behavior without shaming them.

• Let them know you are there for them and your priority is keeping them safe.

Connect with supports

• There are several different ways to seek counseling or treatment. This includes a private therapist, a school counselor, mental health center services, and/or substance abuse treatment. Private therapists can be a licensed clinical social worker (LCSW), a licensed clinical professional counselor (LCPC), or a psychologist. This is usually covered by insurance and occurs weekly or every other week. Most therapists will individualize treatment and may offer more frequent sessions if needed.

• Youth may also be able to receive counseling at school. This may be in the form of a school counselor who is accessible to all youth. The school counselor can give you more information about services available in the school.

• Youth in crisis may need more intensive support than outpatient therapy or school counseling.

Report to Child and Family Services

• If you have reason to believe the behavior may be a result of abuse, call the national ChildHelp Abuse Hotline 1-800-422-4453

• If you have reason to suspect child abuse or neglect, call the Child Abuse Hotline, or visit the State of Wisconsin Child Protective Services website. Be prepared to give them your name, phone number, relationship to the family, and the reason for your call. They will also ask for the youth’s name and date of birth, parent’s name, address, phone number, other adults and children in the home, and any known mental health issues.

• If you have a relationship with the parent, it is preferable to inform them of the report and if possible include them in the call. They may give first-hand information that can help Child and Family Services provide the right kind of intervention.

• You would not want to inform the parent if doing so increases the risk of abuse or retaliation on the child. Your information will not be disclosed to the family as the person who reported. You may also ask the intake worker how they are prioritizing the call so that you know how quickly the local worker will follow up.

Call a doctor

• If you suspect your youth is at risk, you may also get them in to see their primary care doctor for an exam, sex education, or testing.

• If you have a primary care doctor, they may be a good place to call first for education, referral, and consultation on your child's behavior. They may be able to rule out a medical reason for the behavior, and can discuss medication as an option.

Call 9-1-1

• If you have reason to believe the youth may be sexually hurting others or has been sexually assaulted by a non-family member, call 9-1-1 for police intervention.

• When calling 9-1-1, be ready to give the dispatcher the right information. This includes name: phone number, address, date of birth, people involved, a description of the situation, and what kind of help you need. It may be helpful to inform the dispatcher of the child’s mental health issues so that the responding officer is aware. Remember that 9-1-1 is an emergency response, and the goal of the responding officer will be to ensure safety and move on to the next call.

• There are several possible responses by law enforcement. Law enforcement may provide support to stabilize, transport youth to the Emergency Room for evaluation, write a ticket, and/or place a youth in detention.

• Once law enforcement arrives, the outcome is up to their discretion.

WHAT ELSE CAN I DO?

If you would like assistance getting help for yourself or you would like to refer your child, student or friend for professional services, click the button below.

All information shared is confidential and will only be used to help the person you care about, get the help they need.